Self Deception - hindrance to Progress

This post is about how we manage our perception towards others. The earlier post on 'Secret to project success' is about managing stakeholder perceptions. 

But managing our perception is the most fundamental. I realised this aspect when I read a book gifted by my friend - Radhika, with whom I share a good friendship, which actually grew in a very short duration. 

The book is 'Leadership and Self-Deception' from 'The Arbinger Istitute'. 

It talks about 'Self Betrayal', the key ingredient, which impacts our perception. The explanation on self betrayal is rather interesting. 

Self betrayal, is 

'when we don't do something which we feel we should do for others'

The consequence is that we justify ourselves for why we didn't do it and we start blaming the other person for who he has been, that made us not to do. When we start with blaming others and justifying ourselves, we unknowingly make the other person also to be like us. At the end, both of us don't help each other. 

This is a nice concept, and I have placed my life situations - personal and professional, in this behaviour and found it TRUE. 

How do we overcome this? The book emphasises mostly on how we get into this situation (Get into the box- as per the book). How we come out of this, is not discussed in detail in the book. But some explicit hints which come out are

'We should stop resisting others and do what we feel, we should do to them'.

Instead of this, if we want to try other methods like 1) being away from the situation, 2) changing others, 3) changing our behaviour, 4) trying to explain, etc., it will not work.

We need to work in not getting into the 'Self betrayal' mode. And being out of the self betrayal mode is definitely not overwhelming, compared to when we are in it - that's what the book says. 

I tried using this technique, consciously and found there is a difference. But it is not easy, and one need to apply it consciously, until it get into our subconscious mind.

http://devi-projectmanagement.blogspot.in/2012/08/overcoming-self-deception.html

‘What’ and ‘what not’ to delegate?

Are people reporting to you for the first time? First time project manager? First time supervisor? What a great feeling! But along with that feeling comes more responsibility, which is sometimes scary. You need to provide work to your subordinates, which are challenging and at the same time motivating. When your subordinates are fresh out of school, you need to coach them too. Natural mind-set of superiors is to load them to their maximum. This way, they feel that they are being a great supervisor. Sometime, they give them mundane activities, which they would not want to do it themselves. Sometimes they give them tasks that they are supposed to do, meeting with heads of other departments or companies. Sometimes, tasks are also delegated where the superior doesn't want to travel. The problem is even the supervisors are not aware, or not coached on what they should be handling and what should be delegated. Leave alone the first time supervisors, even experienced people heading big departments don’t know the art and purpose of delegation. Sometimes, the superiors don’t trust the sub-ordinates, and hence don’t delegate. In some cases, they feel better to do it themselves, than to delegate, explain and coach the sub-ordinate. Eventually, they end up doing all the work.

Even I faced with a challenge, when people started reporting to me for the first time. First time supervisors need to be trained on ‘delegation’. You need to delegate it right, not too less and not too much, and right job to the right person.

Recently I read an article on ‘PM Network’, by Nicola Hill, PMP, Thomson Reuters, London, England. She had described beautifully, the ‘Mind-set’ and the steps to be taken by supervisors while delegation, and 4 bullet points on the tasks that should never be delegated.

First on the Mind-set: Supervisors should focus on the ‘development needs’ of team members. “The decision on what to delegate ought to center on the development needs of team members” quotes Nicola Hill. She says that supervisors have to identify shining stars for delegating a particular task. But this was not very convincing to me. When you need to develop people by delegation, you need to concentrate on all your sub-ordinates. But have an assessment of the current strengths of your subordinates. The next steps given by Ms. Hill are quite good. You need to give tasks which build upon what he/she is already doing but added with a challenging component. You can also give him tasks in a completely new area. Both these should be incremental, otherwise, it can bring down the confidence of the sub-ordinate. You have to make sure why you are giving him/her the responsibility and make them understand it is a great opportunity to showcase their potential. Closely monitor, coach and help him/her to complete that particular task.

After you understood the expected mind-set while delegating and the steps to delegates, wouldn't it be better to have some clues on what to delegate and what not to delegate.

Ms. Hill says that tasks which can be done 70% (approx.) correctly compared to you, by your sub-ordinate can be delegated.  But apply the next clues on what not to delegate to the above task, to decide on whether it can be delegated. She gives 4 types of tasks which you should not delegate : 1) Tasks for which you are directly responsible, 2) Tasks that you would be unwilling to complete yourself, 3) Tasks that require a level of authorization that a team member does not possess, 4) Tasks for which the necessary tools are not available.

Isn't this a nice thought by Ms. Hill on delegation. This would be definitely useful for both supervisors! as well as for sub-ordinates J.

http://devi-projectmanagement.blogspot.in/2012/12/what-and-what-not-to-delegate.html

A cooking basic - late in my life!

I have seen people cooking vegetables, without water. It cooks so well and it so tasty. My husband is one of them and my mother in law.. My grandmother too.. I have seen them cooking and tried many times. Every time, I used to get some hint and try. But never really worked well. This time, I took another hint 'Fry onions well', until they become soft and translucent. FINALLY WORKED. This was the secret behind those delicious recipes. Instead of 'learning by seeing', I should have done the other way 'learning by questioning'. Probably, I would have learned it many years back.